After deciding to enroll at Towson University, friends of mine joked about me going to “the hood” and the violence in the Baltimore area, but I was never worried.Fitting into this lifestyle felt more natural to me than living in Rochester ever did.I felt a certain pride in hanging out with people who were Dominican, Indonesian, Laos, Filipino, Hispanic, etc. My parents taught me good morals, like not judging others by their appearance, though I did have to keep my jaw clenched when I visited relatives.
Black men are not just super-sexy, they are human beings and deserve of you, not just your sexual side. You don't have to come on strong to get to know a man. It is wise to learn about the history and the current social and racial climate of America before you haul off and say something super-offensive to a Black man in conversation.There are a lot of “Daddy’s Girls” out there, but I am not one of them.To define our relationship like that would misconstrue it; we were simpatico. I’d say it was bad experiences throughout school which probably made me much more accepting.The single parent dilemma is felt the hardest by the children, and as a product of such a household I am lucky enough to have this insight in my dating life.Many guys just don’t know how to deal with a child that isn’t theirs and it becomes immediately evident to the child, even when the mom is disillusioned into thinking that the guy is perfect.I personally have a number of Black male family members and friends who have never been to jail, have college degrees, and are good fathers.Because of this knowledge (and my general affinity for being a tolerant and realistic human being), I believe Black men deserve the utmost respect in relationships, just like anyone else.The most significant difference among them is that this Rochester belongs to a New England state that is listed in bold when you Google “Least diverse state.” If you flip through my year book from senior year, you will count 3 black students in my class, only one of them being male.Although New Hampshire is over 94% “white alone”, (and zero percent Native American) my high school proudly flaunts the Red Raider mascot, a stereotypical Native American with a face tinted blood red (Census Bureau, 2014).Kids can be great bonuses to meeting someone new and they can also be nightmares just as easily.When a man gets older he realizes that the chance of meeting a childless woman thins dramatically and the question of “how” may come to his mind in dealing with a child that isn’t his.